Vera Wang Quote

Coming from a dysfunctional family has its benefits.  When I look at the piles of historic black and white photos I can make their story anything I want.  Their eyes speak out yet their tales are silent. Yes, the many historic photos are my treasures because I can make them into any type of person I want – and I will.

Since momma died I’ve been searching for me – who am I? What do I want to do? What is my passion? Now that the only person that really truly cared about me has passed away who cares about my joys and sorrows?  I do.  I must.

A fellow writer shared a Vera Wang quote this week that helped give me some focus.  “When you have a passion for something then you tend, not only to be better at it, but you work harder at it too.”  She was born June 27, 1949, the same day but different year than my husband and oldest daughter.  The universe is full of Synchroncity, if we pay attention.

I know who I am, and I know what I want to do (write a historical fiction based on my family) and I know that my passion for helping people can occur in many ways.  What I need to do now is be open to that one new friend that I can help and will in turn help me.  They are out there, in the meantime, I’ll stay true to my vision and goals as I continue to learn to be flexible in the execution of those passions.

Until next time – – –

Goodbye My Friend

It was fun watching the Salt Lake City Soccer Team (RSL) play their game in the snow.  The ball didn’t roll away as fast, the players were ever cautious about slipping and getting hurt, and they won their first game since August of 2016.

After the news was over I looked outside and it was snowing here.  The weather man said it would, but it seemed like fiction – it’s April.  But April showers will bring May flowers.  And you know those are for the living. 

As Tracy finishes up fixing the front flower box I need to decide what flowers will live there and what native plants.  It will have water for the hot dry summer days but otherwise they will have to live on what mother nature provides.  That’s what my mother is doing these final days of her life – living off what she has within her and the morphine that smothers the pain from more suffering.  What a terrible way to end one’s life.  Whether you get treatment or not,  it saps your energy, life and spirits.  There’s no sense sending flowers while she’s still with me because she can’t see or smell them.  So I’ll just have to depend on her knowing that I’m with her in spirit. 

I’d plant her favorite pink rose, but the deer with eat them long before the aphids.  And carnations take too much water.  So pink penstemon will be planted in her remembrance.  Pink was her favorite color – she would have loved that 56 carat pink diamond (since she’s an April child) that was just at Sothebys.  She will pass on this week and I will be thankful for the snow.  The peace and quiet it provides as it covers the scars on the earth – much like death.  May you rest in peace my friend.

As for me, I shall begin life again, sine it too has been on hold since August of 2016, waiting for the phone to ring with a strange voice on the other end telling me my best friend has passed on.  I’ll miss her – but I’ll watch for the pink penstemon to bloom each year and remember.

A Look Back at 2016

It’s past time for my annual review of goals, but I’m going to do it anyway.  I usually try to write this prior to Winter Solstice, but this year it’s been hard to focus. 

My Mother had taken the time to reflect on the past year and commented that she had no idea how I had managed to get through 2016, little alone reach any of my goals.  I thought about that and decided I should look back at the year first, then look at what I might have accomplished.

We started the year living in our 25’ travel trailer.  We had sold our home in Escalante, UT and had purchased a new (to us) home in Enoch, but had allowed the sellers to rent back until February 1st.  We put everything we owned in our commercial building in Escalante and went to Quartzsite, AZ for the month of January.  Tracy was changing his hobby/craft one more time from photography to lapidary arts and needed some equipment.

It didn’t take him long to find an 18” and a 24” rock saw.  The bigger problem was how to get them home.  “No problem”, he says.  “We’ll buy a utility trailer and run them home”.  After driving nearly every street in Quartzsite, we finally found an old beater that would work.  It looked like the devil, but was of sound structure and had bigger tires than most.  The saw dealer arranged for the parks’ forklift use and the saws were loaded in no time.

I took advantage of the opportunity and purchased an old mine car complete with rails for front yard décor.  It just fit in the unused trailer space.  We hooked that poor trailer to the truck and headed for Enoch.  That was after we spent a whole day wiring the lights on the trailer.  The ones there didn’t work and we couldn’t haul it 500 miles through 3 states without lights. 

It was a 3-day “adventure” to “run” the trailer home, park it and return. Sore rumps and wet weather made for a “just drive” trip.  On the return trip, we got to the motel at Henderson and were greeted with a pack of big horn sheep. Not something you expect to see in the heart of the Las Vegas Valley.  But all that lovely, well-kept grass was too much to resist for their afternoon nap in the shade of the city park trees.

We returned to Quartzsite for some beads, picks, signs, and the 6 buckets of rough rock we purchased at the Saturday Auction.  Those and the 4 buckets of found rock were tucked under the trailer and we headed to La Mesa, Ca. to see my mom.

Her health has continued to decline and as trustee for the Family trust I needed to gather paperwork for the tax returns.  We took her to Balboa Park and the natural History Museum.  She had ever been.  It’s a place I spent many hours as a teenager, meditating as the pendulum clock knocked over little wooden pegs that marked every 5 minutes, as it swayed back and forth in long arcs across the shiny floor.

Time to return to Quartzsite and retrieve the trailer and rocks.  The sellers had left our new home the 15th of January and the house was ready for repairs.  We were ready for our next major adventure – or so we thought.

Until next time – – –

Ready for Change?

Unless you try something different, you’re going to continue to experience the same results you’ve been experiencing.

 

Not sure how to make the changes?   Try answering these questions, but you must write down all your answers. There aren’t any wrong answers. And don’t erase or cross out any (at least not yet).

What do I really want?

What’s my desired outcome?

What are my gifts and what do I believe about them?

What do I want more of in my life?

Now put them away for a later time.  When you come back you might want to change them or modify them. They are your answers, make them reflect your desires. Add to them with new answers when you’re in a different space.  But write them down.

Be ready to share them when they are completely refined.

More later.

No Christmas Letter this year

Little did I realize what would follow closing the store October,  2014. I was thinking leisure time, bead time, read and write time and travel time. That’s not exactly what happened. 

The beginning of 2015 was read and write time.  A book a week and plenty of time to write.  Then it was get product done for the Moab Art Festival the end of May  Then figure out what to take to the Panguitch Balloon Rally the middle of June.

July was fairly quiet, but August events included two rockhounding trips and a trip to Las Vegas ASD for jewelry supplies.

Our good friend Tony M. Surprised us with a visit and he and Tracy did an overnight at Toroweap. He spent several days with us and then he was off.

September took us to Fillmore’s Old Capital Arts Festival. Double booth space made for 5 hr. Set up and least that long tearing down. We decided that was too much. Home to attend the Escalante Canyons Art Festival and the spoon man was across from us. He gave Tracy an idea for a better and easier set up.

That prompted a trip for wood, fabric, fire proofing, and different tablecloths. All in all we sold #enough product to pay for our trips and all the display stuff and have a little left for supplues. It was #enough.

Now it’s pack and move into the trailer until Feb. 1st, 2016. Four shows next year, all but one inside.

So that’s your Christmas card, letter and gift. MERRY CHRISTMAS and peace in the new year!!!!